Fuck Yeah

Mon, 20 Aug 2007 23:42:44 GMT

I Passed my fucking driving test!!!!

Four fucking minors! WOOT!

Out Of Nowhere

Mon, 09 Jul 2007 10:34:15 GMT

Two things that caught my attention this morning.

The First can't come quickly enough.

And The Second, if it works, would be quite simply amazing.

I don't know how to say good bye
and if I did I'd surely cry - Matt Bowman, Pigeon Detectives

Do As Others Do, But Better

Sat, 30 Jun 2007 01:05:05 GMT

Today I was bored, so I wrote songs. Badly, I hasten to add, but it was an amusing task, yet it lead me to a point where i became frustrated at my lack of musical talent. So I listened to people who know what they're doing very loudly, and got yelled at.

I also find my lack of subject matter irritating, as every time I tried to think of an interesting experience in my life, I was led back to Drugs and/or Sex, which, frankly, arent all that exciting any more.. So, although I have no plans to continue down the depressing (and really rather embarassing) road of lyricising, I want to do something exciting with myself over the next couple of months. Suggestions encouraged.

Lastly, our cat has gone missing, and I suspect we will never see him again, which is a pity, as I was rather fond of him.

"Hate me
Do it and do it again
Waste me" - Kurt Cobain, Nirvana

Sala-ma-Sond

Fri, 02 Mar 2007 16:17:17 GMT

On the far-away island of Sala-ma-Sond,
Yertle the Turtle was king of the pond.
A nice little pond.  It was clean.  It was neat.
The water was warm.  There was plenty to eat.
The turtles had everything turtles might need.
And they were all happy.  Quite happy indeed.

They were... untill Yertle, the king of them all,
Decided the kingdom he ruled was too small.
"I'm ruler", said Yertle, "of all that I see.
But I don't see enough.  That's the trouble with me.
With this stone for a throne, I look down on my pond
But I cannot look down on the places beyond.
This throne that I sit on is too, too low down.
It ought to be higher!" he said with a frown.
"If I could sit high, how much greater I'd be!
What a king! I'd be ruler of all that I see!"

So Yertle, the Turtle King, lifted his hand
And Yertle, the Turtle King, gave a command.
He ordered nine turtles to swim to his stone
And, using these turtles, he built a new throne.
He made each turtle stand on another one's back
And he piled them all up in a nine-turtle stack.
And then Yertle climbed up.  He sat down on the pile.
What a wonderful view! He could see 'most a mile!
"All mine!" Yertle cried.  "Oh, the things I now rule!
I'm the king of a cow! And I'm the king of a mule!
I'm the king of a house! And, what's more, beyond that
I'm the king of a blueberry bush and a cat!
I'm Yertle the Turtle! Oh, marvelous me!
For I am the ruler of all that I see!"

And all through the morning, he sat up there high
Saying over and over, "A great king am I!"
Until 'long about noon.  Then he heard a faint sigh.
"What's that?" snapped the king
And he looked down the stack.
And he saw, at the bottom, a turtle named Mack.
Just a part of his throne.  And this plain little turtle
Looked up and he said, "Beg your pardon, King Yertle.
I've pains in my back and my shoulders and knees.
How long must we stand here, Your Majesty, please?"
"SILENCE!" the King of the Turtles barked back.
"I'm king, and you're only a turtle named Mack."
"You stay in your place while I sit here and rule.
I'm the king of a cow! And I'm the king of a mule!
I'm the king of a house! And a bush! And a cat!
But that isn't all.  I'll do better than that!

My throne shall be higher!" his royal voice thundered,
"So pile up more turtles! I want 'bout two hundred!"
"Turtles! More turtles!" he bellowed and brayed.
And the turtles 'way down in the pond were afraid.
They trembled.  They shook.  But they came.  They obeyed.
From all over the pond, they came swimming by dozens.
Whole families of turtles, with uncles and cousins.
And all of them stepped on the head of poor Mack.
One after another, they climbed up the stack.
Then Yertle the Turtle was perched up so high,
He could see fourty miles from his throne in the sky!
"Hooray!" shouted Yertle.  "I'm the king of the trees!
I'm king of the birds! And I'm king of the bees!
I'm king of the butterflies! King of the air!
Ah, me! What a throne! What a wonderful chair!
I'm Yertle the Turtle! Oh, marvelous me!
For I am the ruler of all that I see!"

Then again, from below, in the great heavy stack,
Came a groan from that plain little turtle named Mack.
"Your Majesty, please... I don't like to complain,
But down here below, we are feeling great pain.
I know, up on top you are seeing great sights,
But down here at the bottom we, too, should have rights.
We turtles can't stand it.  Our shells will all crack!
Besides, we need food.  We are starving!" groaned Mack.

"You hush up your mouth!" howled the mighty King Yertle.
"You've no right to talk to the world's highest turtle.
I rule from the clouds! Over land! Over sea!
There's nothing, no, NOTHING, that's higher than me!"

But, while he was shouting, he saw with suprise
That the moon of the evening was starting to rise
Up over his head in the darkening skies.
"What's THAT?" snorted Yertle.  "Say, what IS that thing
That dares to be higher than Yertle the King?
I shall not allow it! I'll go higher still!
I'll build my throne higher! I can and I will!
I'll call some more turtles.  I'll stack 'em to heaven!
I need 'bout five thousand, six hundred and seven!"

But, as Yertle, the Turtle King, lifted his hand
And started to order and give the command,
That plain little turtle below in the stack,
That plain little turtle whose name was just Mack,
Decided he'd taken enough.  And he had.
And that plain little lad got a bit mad.
And that plain little Mack did a plain little thing.
He burped!
And his burp shook the throne of the king!

And Yertle the Turtle, the king of the trees,
The king of the air and the birds and the bees,
The king of a house and a cow and a mule...
Well, that was the end of the Turtle King's rule!
For Yertle, the King of all Sala-ma-Sond,
Fell off his high throne and fell Plunk! in the pond!

And tosay the great Yertle, that Marvelous he,
Is King of the Mud.  That is all he can see.
And the turtles, of course... all the turtles are free
As turtles and, maybe, all creatures should be.

Ah, Good Old Seuss, I love this poem

Star Wars

Thu, 22 Feb 2007 20:56:31 GMT

My Second Youtube

Windows Is Teh Suckety

Mon, 19 Feb 2007 20:19:02 GMT

Mein First Youtube

Apologies

Wed, 29 Jun 2005 00:14:02 GMT

Terribly sorry, but due to various people I don't particularly want reading the contents within discovering my journal, I've had to make it Friends Only. If, for whatever reason, you wish to plunge into the madness contained in this little section of cyberspace, just leave a comment here, and (unless you're one of the people for whom this journal is unsuitable) you will be welcomed with open arms